I have been exploring the connection between the Spirit, Mind, and Body through a series of paintings that examine the complexities of these three aspects of our existence. For example, the Kama Sutra series focuses on the interaction between the divine Self (part of Consciousness) and our mental and physical experiences in this shared reality. I wanted to continue with that theme, but this is where I often go wrong.

Three panels with leftover wax from previous paintings

I started to rationalize why I should keep visualizing aspects of Eros (connection, creativity, intimacy – Carl Jung). Eros isn’t just about the act itself; what’s more interesting is how the need to procreate ties in with our mental and spiritual desires for bonding. For instance, deep friendships also represent this broader sense of Eros. In my new series of three paintings, I thought about combining botanical elements with female forms to explore how the taboo of showing female reproductive parts could be approached in a more exciting way.

The initial steps

Initially, the idea of representing the female form symbolically through the imagery of a flower felt too obvious and unoriginal. However, after giving it more thought, I found the theme of birth and rebirth to be quite intriguing. This inspired me to create a series of paintings centred around this concept, connecting it to the larger ideas of Spirit, Mind, and Body, as well as reincarnation. At this stage, my focus shifted from exploring body parts to a more conceptual, mind-based approach.

The last phase

The theme of birth and rebirth, represented by the transformation of one form into another, became a powerful foundation for my exploration of the interconnectedness of Spirit, Mind, and Body. This theme, drawn from the metaphorical link between flowers and the human body, encouraged me to dive deeper into the complexities of our existence and the possibilities for spiritual growth and renewal. However, this rational exploration started to drift further away from the initial excitement I felt about the botanical and biological aspects.

The Process

In an attempt to break free from the banality of my initial idea, I decided to melt all of my paintings back into a single puddle of greyish-greenish-brown. This became the foundation for three new paintings that would explore the relationship between Spirit, Mind, and Body. As I began working on the first layer of these new paintings, I found that the paint naturally took on a stone-like texture. This accidental discovery was quite pleasing to the eye and served as a fitting representation of the unyielding nature of the Spirit.

With the concept of rebirth in mind, starting all over again.

Throughout the creative process, the recurring idea (see Thread 1, as an example) of incorporating thread or rope into my work kept resurfacing. Inspiration for this idea came from various sources, including Pinterest posts, a friend’s wool sculptures, and an exhibition featuring flax and linen artwork. Although my initial attempts to combine thread and wax proved to be too messy, the idea persisted.

At this stage, the whole process has been too mental, too intellectual, and too focused on thinking and forcing some logic into my narrative. This approach has not worked well for me, nor has the purely intuitive path. Somewhere in the middle, I find the right balance to be very creative and productive.

Some further attempts seemed to put me back on track, but I was cheering too early. Even though the story that kept evolving made some sense at this point, the paintings just felt “not me.” They felt dishonest, uninteresting, and, to be very honest, pretty ugly. I have no problem with failures, and that might be because I truly enjoy trial and error, within limits, of course. The beauty of encaustic painting is that I can melt everything back into blocks of coloured ‘paints.’ The melted blocks show the average of the colour and value choices of my now non-existing paintings.

Reflection

So, what went wrong? Not only did I rely too heavily on the thinking part of me, but I also allowed myself to be influenced too much by external stimuli. The visit to a couple we recently met and feel are friends stimulated the idea of using threads or wires as a vehicle to communicate connections, directions, and time. The exhibition featuring the beautiful works of Raija Jokinen triggered an older thought about using threads. Stumbling upon a Pinterest post of an artist working with rope reinforced the idea that I should also do something with wires, threads, or ropes. I mistook coincidences and directed browsing (stumbling upon) as a sign of sorts. Although this was not an actual thought, in hindsight, I acted as if it were.

As I am writing this, I am halfway through melting the wax for the aforementioned experiment. There is a cool breeze in my room, and I have decided to leave encaustic painting for a while. I plan to go back to acrylics or dabble in oil painting. I miss the speed of executing ideas and the control over colours and shapes. Oil painting, although I would love to try it one day, feels too slow for me at this stage. Moreover, I have too many ideas in mind I need to execute.